Empathy isn't usually a quality that comes to mind when you think about professional relationships. But empathy is the most important characteristic for relationships, at work or with relatives or friends. If you can put yourself in the other person's shoes, even if you don't agree, you can often see the problem from their perspective. This will then open the door for collaboration and communication. When you're defending yourself, you can't hear what the other person has to say. Here are some tips to be more empathetic to improve all kinds of relationships:
1. Meet in a neutral location, such as a conference room or restaurant, when trying to resolve differences. Do not meet at a party's office because that puts a person in a position of power. If the discussion is between family members, sit together in the kitchen.
2. Establish ground rules before speaking:neither side can use offensive language or personal attacks.
3. Divide the time allowed for the discussion into third parties.
4. For the first part of the time, one person talks while the other person actively listens. Then the other person talks for the second third of the time.
5. During the last third of the time, both parties work together to resolve the issue. You don't have to agree, just work together on a compromise that has value for both people.
Ultimately, trust is based on experience. By using empathy, you develop tremendous trust with your co-workers, significant other or children. The key to a good relationship is reciprocity, where no one wins and no one loses.
