I'm sure at some point in your life you've had to deal with a bad boss. The sad truth is that lousy leaders contaminate an otherwise healthy environment. Some do this more obviously than others through aggressive, loud, opinionated, controlling communication and behavior, and some covertly use their employees and team members as pawns to elevate their own platform. Either way, bad bosses create a devastating, unproductive environment where unnecessary stress and a drop in productivity are not only tolerated but also celebrated.
And while they may excel at their jobs (in terms of effervescence and performance), there are leaders who are placed in management roles that may not be at all qualified to operate in the capacity for which they have been authorized. You know who I'm talking about:bosses who are uncommunicative, political, delusional and narrow-minded; those who got their jobs simply because of those they know without regard to what they know; those who show up late every day and then check the clock every time you move; those without an ounce of true leadership on the inside.
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Immediately after graduating from college, my sister, a communications major, was given a high-paying career opportunity in sales, an area in which she really excelled. She was so good she could sell a melting ice cream to a woman dressed in white. Shortly after being promoted within the organization, she came across a “brick wall” that I will name “Melinda”. Melinda was the company's top saleswoman, herself responsible for more than $2 million in revenue. However, his impressive sales were overshadowed by his inability to effectively lead the team. Quite honestly, his erratic behavior, histrionic outbursts, and verbal abuse crippled his team and ultimately stifled the company's long-term growth. Although she could hold her own, my sister eventually quit her job to pursue other opportunities.
The moral of the story:Everything rises and falls on leadership. Everything.
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If you're in a tight spot with a bad boss, how do you keep your head above water and your fist off the office drywall? Here are four important keys to keeping your cool and successfully navigating your relationship with a lousy boss:
1. Stay consistent.
For me, this is the most important key to dealing with a bad boss because actions speak louder than words. Constant follow-up, constant excellence and consistent communication create a coffer of influence on your behalf. You may have a completely incompetent boss, perhaps one who is even less capable than you, but remember, real leadership is influence, not position. You may not have the title yet, but your consistency will build relationships with your team and earn their trust in the long run. After all, your reputation is worth more than your talent or a big pay raise.
2. Don't take it personally.
Although it looks like you're being thrown under the bus and ignored, it may not concern you at all. Truth be told, you're not the only member of your team who regularly has to deal with fire from your boss. The next time you write a scathing, emotional email in response to a negative situation, read it to yourself (it's cathartic, believe me), take a breath, then delete it and start over. Address the issue, but do it professionally, tactfully, and assertively in writing, then follow up face-to-face where the core value of the relationship can work well as a bridge to healthy, constructive communication.
3. Manage your expectations.
It is important that your desire for excellence, growth, and great leadership does not make you too idealistic. Honestly, it was a challenge for me. I've read a lot of leadership books and am passionate about developing my own potential (as well as the potential of others), but it's important to remember that we're working with real people; people who make mistakes despite their best efforts and who don't always work perfectly. Everyone has a bad day. Everyone hurts. Everyone has weaknesses. Extend the grace, my friend, for you would want the same.
4. Don't complain to co-workers or team members or publicly point out the leader's flaws.
But don't vent your frustration either. Here is a litmus test assessment of your current leadership ability:Handle this situation professionally. Seek out a trusted mentor, your spouse, a significant other, or even HR if the situation warrants their involvement. Dealing with problems will help you find clarity amidst the clouds. You can't let your frustration taint your talent (especially your character) and destroy your reader. Deal with the issue as often as you need to, then make the choice to go with the flow or walk out without building relationship bridges.
If you work for a big boss (or if you work under a big boss) , you are very lucky. In fact, you have to tell them that they are great. If you work for a difficult individual, stay excellent. Stay passionate. Stay assured. Your own leadership capacity will grow immeasurably with you.
