Back at Purdue University, my friends and I were finishing up a fairly mundane night of painting the town red. We decided to cap things off with a trip to Taco Bell. Rather than peacefully wait for his burrito, my all-intoxicated friend decided to fight with some diners.
That might already sound like a bad idea, but it's getting worse:his targets were three linemen Purdue football team offenses. Importantly, this trade took place during Drew Brees' days at Purdue, so these guys were absolute beasts, all topping 6 feet and 300 pounds. Although the only result I could see involved a trip to the hospital, my overconfident friend kept trying to swing those powerhouses.
Fortunately, cooler heads prevailed. We managed to grab our burritos and make it out unscathed. My friend clearly had a bad case of hubris, as well as overestimating my ability to take on "the little guy." What I couldn't foresee was how this near-death experience could serve as an important point of reference as I developed my leadership skills.
Beware of super-leader syndrome.
Take literally, my Taco Bell incident doesn't seem to have much application in the business world. But when you think about it, overconfidence in the workplace can have harsh, career-limiting consequences. I'm often amazed by how many business leaders have significant blind spots when it comes to their own capabilities.
Related: Why Successful Leaders Need to Learn Humility
It's a bit of a superhero complex or, more accurately, a super-leader syndrome. Leaders who believe they are solely responsible for the fate of their company, their community, or the world are not living in reality. No one runs to the nearest phone booth (if any still exist), rips off their work clothes and flies off to save the day. Leaders cannot be successful without a network of people contributing to the larger goal.
Hubris, characterized by excessive self-confidence, creates obstacles to successful leadership. When leaders lack self-awareness, they are unlikely to seek feedback, ideas, or different opinions. As a result, overconfident leaders rely too much on their own views and make decisions without fully analyzing the situation or considering alternatives.
Early in my career, I had a supervisor who constantly talked about his superior leadership skills. He regularly noted how our manager wasted time in meetings on discussion and consensus building. Even though our team was the most productive in the company, my supervisor was adamant he had a better way to lead.
He finally got a chance to put his money where his mouth was after being appointed interim manager following the promotion of our director. I watched him run meetings like a dictator, telling team members what to do and when to do it. He disregarded anyone else's opinions because of his pride. Our meetings were much more efficient, but productivity and group morale both dropped. After observing the difference in leadership styles, I wasn't surprised when he didn't land the permanent position.
Most recently, I worked with an executive who wanted our company to help create a performance management model to deal with high turnover in their business. We started by performing an assessment to understand the causes of turnover, which showed us underlying business issues that performance management solutions would not affect. The CEO believed she knew better, ignored our findings and ordered us to deliver what she requested.
When a leader shuts down the discussion and alternative points of view, he or she is likely to have a disproportionate sense of trust.
I can almost guarantee that this company always has a high turnover. Until she checks her ego, employees will continue to leave the company. When a leader shuts down the discussion and alternative points of view, he or she is likely to have an outsized sense of confidence.
When you understand your strengths and need help, you are better equipped to assess situations and respond to them in ways that earn you respect and set you up for success. Whether you're just starting out in your career or a longtime leader, it's helpful to regularly review how your beliefs compare to how others perceive you. Start with these five steps to improve self-awareness.
Related: 6 steps to discovering your true self
1. Be real with someone you trust.
Feedback is key. It provides the challenges and checks every leader needs. But when you're in a position of power, it's hard to find someone willing to be brutally honest. I suggest you turn to your significant other or a close colleague. Sit down with someone who knows you well and whom you trust implicitly. Ask him to tell you a thing or two that you don't know about yourself. If you're willing to really listen, not just smile and nod, prepare for surprises. This type of dialogue is the perfect way to reinforce that it is impossible to see yourself as the others.
2. Increase 360-degree feedback.
When possible, seek out 360-degree feedback that involves performance feedback from your supervisor, peers, direct reports, and clients. You will also have the opportunity to weigh in. It is instructive to compare your self-assessment to how others perceive you. When you are open to feedback and want to put your ego aside, the results can be life changing. I've seen people cry when they see how others have marked them higher, and I've seen tears when the opposite has happened.
3. Meditate on it.
If you struggle with self-awareness, a daily meditation routine can offer a convenient way to refocus your brain. Spending a few minutes on the train or between dates in quiet contemplation can tell you a lot about yourself. As you focus on clearing your mind, it can be instructive to write down the seemingly random thoughts that come to mind. By recognizing them, you will begin to understand your own thought patterns. As a bonus, studies show a link between meditation and numerous health benefits.
4. Write it down.
Journaling is another great way to improve your self-awareness. By noting how you react to different situations, what you think and how you feel during your daily routine, you create an invaluable record of what is going on in your brain. Once you've tracked things for a while, regularly review your information to understand How you think instead of just what you think. If capturing your thoughts in writing doesn't come naturally, try these journal prompts to get started.
5. Know your type.
Psychometric assessment tools, such as IQ tests or the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, can provide tremendous insight into why you do what you do. Having quantifiable information provides important validation of the inputs from steps one through four, and the results can trigger true revelation. I have seen Myers-Briggs introverted or extroverted typing results completely change a person's understanding of themselves, how they see the world, and how they approach leadership.
Very great leaders are able to check their egos at the door. Whether it's the door to Taco Bell or the door to the conference room, be vigilant about self-awareness. Knowing yourself is the key to success and achieving career aspirations.
Related: 3 steps to an honest self-assessment
