Trying to raise a family the best way you know how is really hard work. It takes a lifetime of love, understanding, forgiveness, support and care; and there is no real guarantee of anything.
Building a business is also extremely difficult work. It takes hours and hours of planning, stress, work, reassessment, fear crushing and focus; (again) there is no real guarantee of anything. So when you mix the two extremes in your life, there are bound to be complications and a tendency to drop one while you nurture the other.
Unfortunately, it is usually the family that is left out (unintentionally).Here are 12 ways to strengthen your family while growing your business.
This little piece of advice was given to me a while ago and it literally changed the way I look at everything in my life. Building your business is a long, difficult road that can suck up your every bit of time and energy if you let it. It's easy to get so caught up in the excitement and momentum of building your business that the family falls by the wayside without you realizing it. Chances are if you're starting a business, it's because you want something better for your family's future. Always keep them first and you will achieve your goal. Forget them, and you'll build a business you love, but resents your family.
We've all had these conversations with our spouse. You know, the ones where you try to explain your master plan and how you're going to achieve it. They look at you in complete boredom or maybe even roll their eyes a bit and respond, "Mmhmm, that's great honey." »
Sound familiar?
No matter how bored and indifferent they seem, they want to know what you're up to. Don't be afraid to continue sharing your business plan and ideas with the family. To start a business, you need support. Bored or not, your family will be better able to support you when you need it if they know what you're doing.
Not only is it important for your family to know what you are doing, but they also need to know why. There will be times when things are difficult and they might not understand what all your efforts are for. By continuing to remind them why you have chosen this path, you will reassure them and give you the confidence to move forward.
I know I know, it's hard to let others join you in growing your business. Sure, we all say we're open to other people's ideas, but are we really? When your spouse has an idea, don't blow it off just because you think you know best. If your children legitimately want to help you, find something for them to do.
Not only will this help you in some way, but it will also reinforce to them that you think of them first. It may seem like such a small thing, but it's the little things that make the difference.
It's just part of good planning. You need to set milestones and goals that you know you can achieve. What is the first thing we want to do when a goal is achieved? CELEBRATE! Of course, you need to set aside time to congratulate yourself on the victory, but you also need to have time to include your family in the celebration. You may have done most of the work, but they are the ones running your support line and taking care of their own concerns with all the energy you put into this business.
You know what your concerns are. After all, you're in the trenches every day. But do you know what your wife's concerns are? Are your children old enough to worry about what might happen if your plans don't work out as you expected?
Chat with them. Ask them. Tell them to be honest with you. Many times they won't want to tell you that they're really scared. They don't want to bother you with what they think are stupid worries. They know they are your support and they don't want you to worry about them too.
It's okay if you don't have any answers. The simple act of talking and letting them know that you care and have the same concerns will be incredibly powerful and will only bring you closer.
It's easy for you to stay motivated 18 hours a day because it's your baby. Remember that your family will not share the same endless enthusiasm as you. They need a break. Don't feel depressed or angry when your wife says, "I'm sorry baby, but if I hear about ___ one more time this week, I'm going to put all of Freddy Krueger on your ass."
This one sounds so simple, right? Admit it. If you say you're only going to work until 4:00 p.m., do you actually stop all of that at 4:00 p.m.? Before you answer, really think about it. Yes, maybe you close the laptop and leave the office, but what about that “smart” phone? For the reasons mentioned in #7, it is important for your family to know that you can and you are ready to shut down everything else to focus on them.
It's easy to think that your goals are the same as the rest of the family. After all, you are doing this for them. All the hard work, the stress, the long hours, what else would it be for? Even though everyone was aligned at the start, things change :
Sit down with your family (all together or individually) and ask them what they really think about the direction the family is going. This might be a tough question to ask your kids. Not necessarily heavy on the subject, but difficult for them to fully grasp and respond to. You might be better off continuing to ask what their aspirations and interests are as they get older.
This is especially important if you work from home and have young children. It can be difficult at first to teach them boundaries, but if you want to accomplish something, they need to know that your work time is very important and requires a lot of focus. At the same time, they need to know that you're ready to drop everything (without being annoyed) when they really need your help.
The wonderful thing about being your own boss is that you can make your own hours. If you decide to spend a day with the kids, don't back down because you've suddenly been inspired to write a new blog post, create a new dish, or add a new vendor to the store. Don't blow up your family for work. They'll end up resenting what you're doing in the long run.
Growing your business is a daily educational process in almost every walk of life. As you learn these lessons, teach them to your children as well. Not only is there something so rewarding and reassuring about teaching your children the lessons you learn, but it's also a bonding experience that far too many people miss out on.
You can't expect to grow your business without hitting some roadblocks – MANY of them. Expensive tools will break without warning, trusted employees will turn to the dark side, sales will be non-existent, naysayers will shout NO, and all of this will happen at the worst possible times.
Do not hide your worries and worries from the family. I know, it's hard. Whether it's your pride, fear, or feeling like you need to protect the family from worry, none of us want to tell others that things suck and may be about to get worse. You must guard your family through all the ups and downs.
Remember in #2 how we talked about your family as your support? They can't give you the support you need if they don't know what's going on. Of course, remember that they may need support and reassurance after hearing about the shit that hits the fan. These are the times that really bring you together as a family. Talk about each other's concerns, build your game plan, move forward and grow your business.
How do you keep your family first?
I'm sure you can think of many more ways to keep your family involved and close while building a better future for them. Tell in the comments how you keep working hard on your dreams while keeping your family first.
